My Blanken World

My world of boys, textiles and moving.

Scewed perspective March 7, 2017

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no parking

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I know it’s not Saturday, but something has been on my mind all day.  Sharing usually fixes that right?

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One of the last few days of work, I came in at later than usual (5:00 am if you care), so the parking lot already had cars in it.  Because it had been snowing all night, the lines weren’t visible.  People parked the best they could, but inevitably some were parked a little off… or more than a little off.  The whole row was actually tilted the complete wrong way on a one way row.  By the time I got out of work, the snow had melted enough from people driving on it, to show the correct position to park.  I of course, was now the only one parked incorrectly because every one else that was there before me, had left work already.

Someone was nice enough to leave a “clever” note written with the winter grime on my back windshield, along with their less than creative drawing of a penis.  Which, had nothing to do with what they wrote.  I mean, if they had said I parked like one, I would have at least gotten the reference?!  But no, it was a random penis, along with the fact that I don’t park well (paraphrased).

My point.

We don’t always know why people do what they do.  They may actually be doing something because they really are just that screwed up, or uncaring.  Or life’s circumstances may have brought them to that spot, in that way.  Someone else may have caused the position they’re now stuck in.

Most things we can avoid by just being proactive – I could have come out on my lunch break to move my car, but the thought never even crossed my mind while I was doing my job.  I was focused on doing my work well, not on where my car was parked, or if the snow was even melting.

The next time you see someone doing something that seems totally bass ackwards, or even parked strangely for that matter, stop to think before leaving that giant penis.  First, does the penis make sense with what I’m writing?  And second, could they maybe, possibly just have been screwed over by the people before them?

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hummer

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Ok, some people really are just jerks!

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….aaannnddd I’m back. February 11, 2017

 

 

tree

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“From where?” you may say.  From working outside the home 30-40 hours a week, on top of babysitting our mortgage companies antics – away from my boys and all that keeps me, me.

Not to say I didn’t enjoy my work – I have a secret – I LOVE WORKING!  And there lies my problem.  I love working so much, that I tend to over due it.  Family… what family?

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So, after 6 months, and the majority of our repair bills paid off (would have been more if Seterus would stop screwing up our mortgage… but I digress..), I’ve come home again.  And four hours after being out of work, I was going nuts!  But that’s ok.  I had plans….

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…two days after that, I sprained my wrist severely on our lovely, lovely ice/snow/ice combo.

*There goes my plans*

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I enjoyed my very active job.  I enjoyed helping people feel better.  I enjoyed helping them find what they needed.  And I enjoyed “owning” “my section”.   I loved my co-workers, and most of the people I met.  (I’m talking to you crazy woman who commented on my parenting skills!)

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Beforehand I thought God had given this to us just at the right time to give us the extra cash we needed to get these bills paid off.  But I started to realize He gave it to me at this time to help tire me out.  Spin my wheels a bit.

I’m a doer.  A fixer.  I want something; I make it myself.  I want something done; I get it done myself.  And I keep trying to fix this problem myself.  The last few years though, I’m slowly starting to get that I can’t.  I have to give it to God – AND LEAVE IT.  And for someone like myself, that. is. excruciating.

Yes we got some extra cash to pay down the repair bills, but He threw in a few extra kinks to show me that there will always be something, if I allow it, to keep me from enjoying my family and the life He’s set out for us.

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And my plans for getting the whole house cleaned and the renovation started back up, got kicked out from under me with a sprained wrist.

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*ARE YOU FINALLY READY TO REST AND GIVE IT TO ME*

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What my bible study ladies, my dentist man, and God have all been trying to tell me for a very long time.

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And as I’m arguing…. eh er… praying this morning in frustration over not knowing our next step.  What I should be doing.  Feeling like a flopping fish out of water.  My daily bible verse showed up.

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Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord.

– Psalm 27:14 (NIV)
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Ahhh… I love it when that happens.
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Will it be easy for me?  Oh heck no!  But it is the guidance I was asking for.
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Sometimes doing nothing, takes the most strength.
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So, I’m back.  There will be sewing again.  There will be renovating again.  There will be comical stories about my insane family again.  A few life lessons thrown in between there again.
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And thank you for your patience, again.
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mountains